Will we win a middle at the lympics?

There are just 24 hours to go before the fireworks are lit and the Beijing Olympics gets underway, propelling us into three weeks of wonder, amazement and wondering where they got those drugs from.

We have three very good athletes representing us — Paul Hession, Olive Loughnane and Mayo cyclist but Galway resident David O’Loughlin. But those aside, Galway has great hopes of taking a medal in the Olympics with up to a dozen people with local connections having discreetly set off for Beijing with high hopes of coming back with something around their neck. And to be fair to them, this week, we pay tribute to these secretive athletes, we applaud their efforts and assess their medal chances.

One of our brightest hopes has to be Ardrahan’s Michael The Stroke Fahy. Having been ensconced in a top secret training camp in the Midlands for most of last year, Michael has to have hopes of a medal in the fencing competition.

In the boxing ring, too there are medal hopes for John Mulholland and Daniel Callanan. These pair of athletes were dedicated to their training , and showing the sacrifices that Olympians have to make, even gave up their Christmas dinner to engage in a sparring contest in the Park House tournament of last December. It’s the stuff of Rocky, isn’t it?

In the kayaking, Ger Loughnane has teamed up with John O’Mahony and they have been performing well in training. In recent days, they have joined up to practise their canoeing on the treacherous waters of Shit Creek, and the lads are now quite adept with using just their hands to propel the canoe.

Padraig O Ceidigh — backwards running. In recent days he and his coach Bould Mick ‘Leary have been putting the finishing touches of Padraic’s hopes of a backwards running medal. Seemingly Mick would draw up a schedule for Padraig with the distance increasing each week, culminating in the final training session in which Mick suggested he should f**k off back to Connemara — a tough conclusion to a brittle training run. We’re behind you Padraic.

Hopes that Joe Canning would make it to Beiijing have been scuppered by the professional deal he did with Wonderbra. Seemingly so interested were they in his recent one-man show against Cork that they have ditched Eva Herzigova and Irina Legova from their posters and are to use Joe’s picture instead with the strapline — “Poor Joe — he’s got no support.” So no Chinese takeaway for Joe this month.

Three day eventing — Mayor Padraig Conneely is a dark horse in this contest but his chances of medals have been boosted by his ability to ensure that recent Galway City Council meetings are at least a two-day event, and if you can manage that, surely a three-day event is just around the corner.

Ted Walsh was hoping to win something in the snow boarding, until he found out that’s a Winter Olympics sport. He thought he had a chance on the basis that there’s ‘snowboarding available in Galway during Race Week for a reasonable price, so that’s why I does go home in the evening.” Not to be outdone, he tried his hand at the waterpolo, but he kept drowning the horses.

Galway had considered entering a team in the baseball but they found that there was little point as the Mullingar team had all the equipment bought up, so they must be in with a serious chance.

So that’s it. They’re our representatives — Nobody in the beach volleyball, but then if you really want to see boobs and asses hopping up and down, you can always go along to City Hall two Mondays a month. Now, pass me the steroids there, my heart rate is slowing up.

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