The Pain and Powerlessness of Resistance!

with Mairead Heagney

Resistance is not accepting, rebelling against or fighting back. This can be seen in all areas of life. It is wanting things to be, as I believe they should be. It is believing that I know best as to how my life, and the lives of others, should be (played out ). It a form of God complex, some would say! Non – resistance on the other hand , is the absolute and complete acceptance of life as it is and as it unfolds. It is submitting to life.

Submitting to what is required of me to allow for growth and evolution. Only when we see, and accept this can we then go about bringing any change, big or small. Non-resistance is full acknowledgment, full acceptance of the situation as it currently stands. Only when we accept can we then make change. Resistance is tension, denial, saying no to what life brings to my door. If I am sick I cant get well until I accept the sickness. The denial of the sickness in the first place causes the pain (which is only your bodies way of drawing your attention to the sickness ), not the sickness itself.

Once I accept the illness I allow the journey to take me where I need to go, this often includes to recovery and full wellness. Only when I accept the situation can a miracle proceed to unfold. Let's take a simple example; I get an electricity bill through the door, I expect that it should only be about €100, but instead the bill reads €500. How do I react? I get angry, call the help line denying the bill, telling them that they are wrong and have made a mistake. I am aggressive and vent my frustration at the person on the other end of the phone. I resist the bill and deny the amount, this only ends in causing me pain and distress.

Even exhaustion. I have compounded the problem by not allowing life to flow. The person at the other end of the phone resists my anger and now, the problem is even bigger; not only do I have a bill to pay but I am in conflict with that person. We are at an impasse – resistance meeting with resistance. It could however play out another way, a way of non-resistance. Upon receiving the bill, I could first accept that the bill states the amount owed is €500.

Once I have no resistance to that, I can then go ahead and make a call to the company and query the bill. The person receiving my call will then be most likely open to discussion and to helping me solve the problem the unexpected amount of money. Perhaps, it’s a mis-print, perhaps I miscalculated. What is important is that I did not resist and that the problem which had initially caused me great stress, worry and anger was both solved and dissolved. I accepted the initial situation in order, which in turn allowed me to find peace, both with myself, the person on the phone and the bill. Non-resistance does not mean that I am wrong, it does not mean that I am powerless.

Instead it is a way of engaging my full power. I only become truly powerful when I accept. Resistance is fear and Non-resistance is courage, true courage.

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